Fix that Attitude

.

.

The best way to knock the chip off your neighbor’s shoulder is to pat him on the back.

By : Author Unknown

Other people’s attitudes or “chips” can cause great pain.  I used to let them make me feel inferior or broken.   Now I try to accept who they are, pat them on the back knowing one day the light bulb will come on.  But more important, I try to not let them hurt me.  I am not inferior.  I am different, yes.  But so is everyone else in one way or the other.

One foot in front of the other

The best way out is always through.

~ Robert Frost

Forgive

We achieve inner health only through forgiveness

– the forgiveness not only of others but also of ourselves.

By : Joshua Loth Liebman

The small steps

What is the sound of one hand clapping?

–Confucius

.

What is the sound?  I believe this is supposed to be focused around self promotion, bragging, inflated egos, etc.  But I’d like to take it in another direction.

One hand clapping, or one person congratulating himself can be a good thing in the life of the depressed.  There are things we do on a daily basis that the non-depressed take for granted.  If we were to tell them of being pleased that we were able to get out of bed, that we were able to interact at a social setting, or go to work 5 days straight; they would look at us in confusion.  Sometimes I think it is good to clap for ones self.  So, what is the sound of one hand clapping?  It is the sound of a 40 hour paycheck, finding out there’s someone else near you with depression or going outside for a walk.  It’s little steps that get us through the day.  The sound of one hand clapping is the successful completion of a normal day.

Belief in Success

.

To succeed, we must first believe that we can.

—Michael Korda

.

To succeed, to succeed at what?  I live with the depression part of bipolar every day.  I take enough medications to start my own pharmacy.  And I don’t see myself as reaching my definition of the “normal” mood range.  I was talking to my psychiatrist the other day, trying to explain.  To hell with his opinion of normal.  He doesn’t have to live with “this”.  It becomes hard to continue on the regimen set up to supposedly protect me for stimulus that will trigger an event when I can’t see the prize.  I’m the one who mechanically goes through each day putting on “hats”  (my name for putting on artificial moods and personalities) to socially appear normal for the situation.  I don’t see my moods, social interactions, etc as on the same level as those around me.  But I’m told to continue, to believe I can do it.  Stay on the regimen.  Keep taking the meds.

I haven’t had a serious episode in a year now.  That’s great, right?  I still have the same job, home, companion…… I am managing to keep this blog and other daily activities going.  Is this my normal?  One day I want to smile, just because I’m alive.  Not because the self help books, doctors, therapists tell me it’s the appropriate thing to do.

I believe I can.  I believe I can.  I believe I can succeed at being a productive member of society.  Even though I do have this hurdle called Bipolar.  I believe I can.  I believe I can.  I believe I can succeed at just being “happy” today.