Who am I?

Over the past few weeks, meds have been added to the list of chemicals that keep me productive and socially acceptable.  Meds to increase this behavior and reduce that behavior, all designed to mold me into me.  But the question always arises, who am I?  Is the medication going to control too much of a behavior or maybe totally supress a trait that is part of me?

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This is the foundation thinking for my master plan of being chemical free.  I’ll admit it is an unhealthy and unrealistic plan considering how poorly I function without chemical help.  But the thoughts always haunt me when new medication is introduced.  Some wonderful personality trait is going to be lost in order to control a symptom of my disorder.

There is a deep seated desire for a quality life.  Where do I draw the line?  At what point do I stop giving up pieces of me in order to fit in mainstream life.  What if I am eccentric or unique?  Are a couple of quirks really that bad compared to a zombie existance?

I exagerate.  But thats part of my personality also.   I’m just worried.  Who am I and what can I keep?

Pls excuse typos.

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